Pharmacy Embarrassment

Monday night was rather embarrassing for me.  As a woman, I should be comfortable with my period.  No woman that I know likes the pain associated with it much but we deal; just like we deal with colds better than the manliest of men who turn into tiny little babies crying for their momma because they have a cold.

By the way Mother Nature, why do we get the brains, beauty and the ability to bear children and men get to stand to pee?  We are the efficient, well organized sex and yet men get the ultimate time saving “tool”.

I digress.

While we were shopping to for baby deals on Monday night I thought to pick up pads for after the baby arrives.  Man, you have no idea how awkward that was for me.

As I mentioned, I SHOULD be comfortable with my period.  I am, but after 20+ years I have only used pads twice in my life and I have no idea what the heck to look for; wings vs no wings, overnight vs days and liners vs full pads.  It was so strange.

As I mentioned I have only worn pads twice in my life, the first time was the very first day of my period – ever!  It also happened to be the worst possible day too.  It was the first day of 6th grade at a brand new school, what a way to make a girl feel more awkward than throw her for a loop when she is supposed to try to fit in.  Needless to say, it didn’t work, I was a loner and not many people liked me.

The second time was after my son was born and I used the hospital ones and felt like I was in diapers forever.  I don’t even remember how long I used them for but I do remember spending a lot of time in the shower until my period returned back to normal.

Back to the awkwardness…so…there I was standing in the isle looking at all of the options before me and I look over at Ty (the only man in the isle trying to disappear from site of strangers passing by) and I ask him in a hushed tone “Which ones should I get?”. The look on his face was priceless as he looks at me and said that he has no idea.

News flash!  Neither do I!  That is why I asked you. Duh! I don’t have any idea what to get.

I have used tampons for 20 years.  My tampons are tiny and have no applicator so it makes them prefect to bury in the cart while shopping and again on the belt at the register.

I think I would have been less embarrassed about not knowing what to get in the condom isle because well…we will need those soon too. (Sorry mom!)  I have no interest in getting knocked up again, at least not for a while.


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